Lori A. Brotto

Overview

"Better Sex Through Mindfulness" by Lori A. Brotto is a thoughtful exploration of how mindfulness can enhance sexual experiences and overall well-being. As a psychologist and sex researcher, Brotto dives into the science behind mindfulness and its myriad benefits for sexual health. By combining anecdotal evidence from her own clinical practice with rigorous scientific research, she offers readers practical tools and exercises to develop mindfulness skills and improve their sexual lives. Through this book, Brotto aims to dismantle the stigma surrounding sexual difficulties and empower individuals to cultivate a mindful and pleasurable sexual experience.

Key Points / Ideas

1. The power of mindfulness: Brotto introduces the concept of mindfulness as a practice of non-judgmental awareness. She emphasizes how it can help individuals overcome sexual challenges, such as low desire, anxiety, or trauma. By being present in the moment and cultivating a curious mindset, individuals can experience greater pleasure and intimacy.

2. Understanding and embracing desire: Brotto challenges the notion of spontaneous desire, highlighting that sexual desire can be responsive rather than automatic. By developing body awareness and observing sensations without judgment, individuals can become more attuned to their desires and enhance their sexual experiences.

3. Mindfulness of pleasure: Brotto discusses the importance of embracing pleasure in one's sexual journey. Through various exercises like sensory eating or mindful touch, individuals can break free from negative sexual narratives, reconnect with their bodies, and savor pleasurable sensations.

4. Overcoming barriers: Brotto explores common barriers to sexual satisfaction, including distractions, fatigue, and self-criticism. By practicing mindfulness, individuals can build resilience and develop coping strategies to overcome these obstacles. Brotto also explores how mindfulness can benefit individuals with sexual dysfunction or chronic pain.

5. Communication and connection: Brotto emphasizes the importance of open communication and active listening in fostering intimacy. Mindfulness not only enhances self-awareness but also deepens connection with a partner, creating a safe space for vulnerability and mutual growth.

Significant Evidence

Throughout the book, Brotto supports her arguments with scientific research and case studies. She cites studies that link mindfulness to increased sexual satisfaction, improved overall well-being, and decreased sexual distress. Brotto also shares personal anecdotes from her clinical practice, demonstrating how mindfulness techniques have helped patients overcome sexual challenges and reclaim their pleasure.

Conclusion

"Better Sex Through Mindfulness" offers invaluable insights and practical exercises for individuals seeking to enhance their sexual experiences. Brotto's accessible writing style, combined with her expertise in both psychology and sex research, makes this book a valuable resource for anyone looking to improve their sexual well-being through mindfulness. By destigmatizing sexual difficulties and providing evidence-based strategies for cultivating mindfulness, Brotto empowers readers to nurture a more fulfilling and pleasurable sexual life. Whether you are seeking to overcome specific challenges or simply deepen your connection with yourself and your partner, this book is a must-read.

For those interested in further readings on the topic, "Come As You Are" by Emily Nagoski and "The Mindful Couple" by Robyn D. Walser and Darrah Westrup offer complementary perspectives on sexuality, mindfulness, and relationships.